The Bully Teacher That Is Every Parent’s Worst Nightmare

 

Any time the word ‘teacher’ is mentioned in conversation, everyone in the room suddenly has very strong feelings.   In fact, people are as passionate about teachers as they are about politics.  Love ’em or hate ’em, everyone has an opinion; and more often than not, people are usually very vocal with their emotions.

Let me start by saying that we’ve had some INCREDIBLE teachers over the years.  We’ve experienced the best-of-the-best, but unfortunately we’ve also experienced the worst-of-the-worst.  There are people in this world that were literally put on this earth to teach.  They put their heart and soul into teaching and it shows every day in their students.  Those teachers are priceless.  Most of us couldn’t do what they do, day in and day out, and keep our zest for life.  Teachers are not just teachers, they wear so many hats.  They’re counselors, nurses, beauticians, managers, janitors, mediators, and pros at crowd control.  There’s no doubt about it, they have their hands full.  And I will never take a good teacher for granted, ever again.

But then there is the flip side: the side that most people want to ignore, or sugarcoat, and pretend like it isn’t an issue.  But i’m just going to come out and say it {or yell it from the mountaintop} there are A LOT of people who are teachers that should have never become a teacher.  There are teachers who abuse their powers.  There are teachers who are rude, bitter and childish.  There are teachers who are clinically, mentally ill.  And there are teachers who are BULLIES!  Teachers who live out a real live scene from ‘Mean Girls’, bullying innocent children on the daily.

Unfortunately, as a family, we’ve experienced these teachers over the years.  We experienced a teacher who just wouldn’t show up for work, for weeks at a time.  My husband would go to drop our daughter off for first grade and her teacher would be a no-show.  The door was locked, the room was dark, and the tiny naïve first graders would be lined up down the hall with nowhere to go.  They didn’t understand, and for a while we didn’t either, until we finally found out that our teacher was now a patient at a psychiatric facility.  The same teacher who was in charge of my precious baby was completely mentally unstable.  As time went on, we learned more and more from our girl.  We learned of the hurtful words and phrases that this teacher had spewed at the children.  We learned how this teacher had been so negative and so cruel that she had crushed my daughters self esteem.  We learned how this teacher would pull the blinds down on the door and turn the tv on all day, rather than teaching.   And most importantly, we eventually discovered that my daughter had learned virtually nothing during her 1st grade year: one of the most critical learning years in early education.

We’ve also experienced a teacher who was the worst bully that I’ve ever encountered in my lifetime.  She taught her daughter, who was also in the same elementary school, to rigorously pick on my child in a malicious way.  She coached her daughter to lie and fabricate stories.  This teacher and her daughter were constantly spreading false rumors about my child, all the while she was trying to sabotage my child’s relationship with other children at the school.  She constantly metaled in my child’s school life and she coerced and convinced other teachers to not like my child, because her and her daughter simply ‘had it out’ for my little girl.  The stories I could tell you are straight out of a lifetime movie, I’m not even kidding.  And, once again, this behavior was coming from a teacher who was supposed to be in charge of my child’s well being.

My biggest regret as a parent is that I set back and let these things happen to my child.  I made small complaints, but those weren’t enough.  Those calm, mild manner complaints were repeatedly overlooked and swept under the rug.  I look back on that time in our lives and I think “how did I let that happen?”  Why did I not march into that school and scream, throw fits, and turn shit over in the principals office until someone paid attention to me?!  Why was I so nice when those teachers were clearly liable of malpractice.  Why didn’t I do more?  Sometimes the guilt I feel is overwhelming.  I spent both of those years constantly trying to be the peace keeper, but I will never ever do that again.  If I have to fly my crazy flag I will do it proudly.  I’ll go down in a blaze of glory!

The moral of the story is, if you feel that your child is being mistreated at school, you are their only voice.  And you better use a megaphone to get your point across.  If something is seriously wrong, and you feel it in your gut, then don’t be calm like I was – calm doesn’t catch anyone’s attention.  Be bold, be brave and be your child’s advocate because no one else will be.

After all of the stress and drama that my daughter had encountered, we noticed that it was taking a toll on her physically and mentally.  We witnessed the joy drain from her eyes and we saw a sadness taking over her body.  She was mentally and phsycially exhausted.  Her confidence was nonexistent and she felt totally defeated.  It was at that moment that we said, “NO MORE!”  We moved to a new school district and it was THE BEST decision we’ve ever made in life.  Her 4th Grade teacher was absolutely amazing.  She totally reprogrammed my child to love school again.  She was an angel sent from God and i’m forever grateful.  I’m in no way trying to vilify teachers, that isn’t what this is about.  My point is, there are wonderful people and wonderful teachers in this world.  But, unfortunately, shitty people become teachers too.  Don’t always assume that just because someone is a teacher that they’re an amazing person.  Keep your momma senses on high alert at all times.

Just keepin’ it real.  Much love – XOXO-

Jill

 

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